Just tired….. But God!

Photo By Candy Clonts

Photo By Candy Clonts

Can’t sleep…tired of being sick…stuffy nose, headache….ugh…..going on 2 weeks or better with this stuff… and all the everyday stuff I’m now having to learn to live and deal with. (sigh ;p )

“Are you complaining?”
“I’m sorry, but, yes I guess I am Lord.”
“Why?”
“I’m tired…”
“Tired of what?”
“Lord You know, just plain not feeling well, seemingly one thing or another. And now this cold that has hung on for so long. Just tired of feeing…You know what I’m talking about?”
“Of course I do. So what are doing about it?”
“What am I to do? I’ve done everything I know to do get rid of all this.” “Exactly!”
“HUH!”
“You are doing this all on your own. Where have I fit into how you feel? Don’t you think I know how you are feeling?”
Yes, Lord.”
“Are you sure?” 
“Lord we have been through this before. Now I feel like when You were asking Peter to feed Your sheep if he loved You.” (John 21:15-19)
“Ok, so what are you going to do.”
“Just as Peter did, follow You.”
“Is that all you are going to do, is follow Me?”
“No Lord I want more than Peter did at this time.”
“So what is that?”
“I want and desire to lay down my life at all cost and follow You.” (Matthew 16:24-28)
“Are you?”
“Lord I so desire to embrace You and all You have for me.”
“Tell Me dear one, then who are you embracing at this moment?”
“Please don’t say it like that; it is my life I am embracing. I am holding on to me and how I am feeling and not what You want or desire to do with me for Your glory. I haven’t laid my life down yet, have I?”
He looks at me with a loving and gentle smile.
Jesus, I know You are wanting and trying to teach me, direct me, show me so many things about myself and YOU, but I seem to continue to fall into the ‘Peter Syndrome’…that is always thinking how I feel and how things affect me.”
“The ‘Peter Syndrome’ seems to sum it all up. As I walked and talked with Peter that day, won’t you walk with Me. Come with Me.” (Matthew 11:28-30)
“Yes I will. But Lord what are WE going to do about my health?”
“What do you want done about it?” 
“To be honest Lord,  looking at it from a different perspective now, nothing.”
Jesus wants NOTHING to come between our relatioship with HIM.

Jesus wants NOTHING to come between our relatioship with HIM.

“Why is that?”
“I’d rather have all I can get of You than to feel good for a time.” (2 Cor. 4:8-18; 1 Cor. 10:11-14)
“You are no different from anyone else My dear one. All have troubles and sufferings. All need to come to the same place as you do every time.”
“I am also tired of having to come to this place of like I have failed AGAIN.”
“Have you?”
“In some way yes.”
“Why do think that?” “Because, I get my eyes off You and onto ME and MY feelings and situations. I seem to find myself right back here.”
“Back to what or where?”
“To how desperate I am for You.”  
“Aren’t you desperate for Me all the time, I am desperate to be with you all the time.” (Jer. 31:3)
“I can’t fix this and I am always trying to.”
“So you are trying to be self-sufficient?”
“You put it that way, yes.”
“Dear one you know you do not have the ability to do what is right for you, yet you strive to do so.”  (2 Cor. 3:4-5)
“You’re right. Lord, my Savior, place forgive me again. I have sinned and fallen short of Your glory.” (1 Thes. 2:12; 1 Peter 4:13; 1 Peter 5:10)
“I love you dearest one, always have and always will. My love has never changed for you nor will it. You stand forgiven before Me.” (1 John 2:12)
“My Lord, please help me to keep in check. To keep You before me. I can not do this alone.” (2 Cor 5:7; Rom. 8:24-25)
“I never asked you to do this alone.” (Heb. 13:5; Psalm 37:23-34)
(Not only do we want the Lord to come and sit with us, but more importantly He wants us to come and sit a while with HIM. Revelation 3:20 (KJV) Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me.)

I thank you all for sitting a spell with me. I have been away for many reason. One day I will perhaps sit and chat with you about that. I thank you for your payers and love.

Lord bless you and His grace continue to lead you through the great hope we have in Christ Jesus our Lord, Savior and coming Bridegroom.

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