This is a long post. Some will agree, while others will not. This is not the reason I am posting this. I am posting this for selfish reasons, freedom. My desire is to please the Lord above all things. I want to let go of the past and present with the utmost desire to forgive. I desire true forgiveness in my life. I have harbored the sin of unforgiveness far to long. Yes unforgiveness is sin. I apologize to you and to my Jesus, Lord and Savior. This story you might not understand, it had shown me some of my down falls.
Alcoholism, I hate it, it’s a horrible addiction. It is like most any other addiction, deceptive and deadly.
Many people around an alcoholic will get hurt. The alcoholic not only damages their own body, but does seriously damages and injures those around them.
Alcoholics will eventually alienate themselves from everyone and everything. They will lose everything they hold dear. They will lose all drive and dreams in life as well as care and hope for any and everything. Their addiction will be everyone’s fault or responsibility but not theirs. They’ll eventually feel like the walking dead. They stop going through the motions of life. Why? It’s not worth it.
They do see the cliff of death ahead. They hear your screams to stop, “LOOK WHERE YOU ARE HEADED.” The rail car they are in keeps going faster and faster, the bridge is out at the cliff…..”JUST JUMP”, that’s all they need to do. They also feel they have burned too many bridges behind them, there’s no turning back. There’s nothing good ahead, nor is there any thing to go back for. So, if they stop or jump, where are those that were trying to get them to quit, to get off that run away rail car. Many times sad to say, doing what is important to them, just doing their own thing as before. So often this scenario is so true and those people who want something better for you seem to have lost interest. Abandonment, that is, “are leaving me?”, only until that person is well and going the direction they ought to.
We need each other. There are two sets of people who need healing, the alcoholic and those damaged by it. Healing starts with me, it starts with you, then the alcoholic. Forgiveness, is a great healing salve. Let go so you can heal and they can get a head start with you, with me.
It seems no one wants to come along-side and get their hands dirty for many reasons, but are they legitimate. Yes we need to let go so they can start seeing they are plummeting and quickly. But these also need sounding boards; someone to possibly yell at and for those who are getting lashed out at, will you still be there. To hold the hand that can not hold on any longer. Then walk away for a bit so they can begin to understand what they have done and said. Sometimes they might need someone to help them with the next step, because the view is growing dim and their feet are growing heavier with each step. Walk a step or two with them; your healing process needs to take place also. Be there and say “I love you” without any “but”, because that nullifies every positive thing just said. Then walk away again and so on.
We humans are so quick to be judge and jury, then hang each other out to dry and go our merry way. There seems to be no mercy in the end. At this time in my life I’m trying to come to the place where I can learn to have a God like manner. He is judge and jury, BUT He also has great mercy and compassion. I know I’ll never meet that goal, because I’m not God, but I want to aim to have forgiveness, love, grace and mercy for others as He has for me.
A great Scripture and story, if you will, is in Matthew 18:21-35. If you haven’t read it in a while please do so again, it is a great reminder of judgments, mercy, love and character.
*Coming alongside someone who has hurt you is not always the right thing to do, but forgiveness is. Forgiveness is freedom for you and the offender, no matter if they know it or not, you do; that is also a part of the freedom of forgiveness. Set yourself free, forgive. Don’t live in a self-made prison of unforgiveness. Unforgiveness leads to another kind of death, you don’t want that either. Live and live life the way God has intended….free in Him.
**Just a note – The story I have told you is true, but not with me specifically. Even though the one dealing with alcoholism does…it’s kind of weird how God has brought me around in such a way to acknowledge my lack, my sin, in not willing to let go and forgive. What bondage I have put myself in. Freedom has started today. Praise God! I thank the Lord for His continual grace on me, His grace has renewed my hope. Thank You, Jesus and all who are praying for me, longer than I would like to know, I’m sure…..quite a while. Ugh!!!!!
God bless you and thank you for “listening.” Pray for me as Jesus and I tackle this NEW journey of forgiveness. My desire is to give it over to Him, ALL of it.
Grace and Hope be yours through our Savior, Jesus,